Applied Merphology



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Richard's Ownership Rules

1. If you store something long enough, you can safely throw it away.

2. If you throw something away, you will need it right away.

Gillette's House Moving Act

Anything lost during the first move will be found during the second move.

Glatham's law of money-grubbing

The apparent usefulness of any product becomes inversely proportional to its actual usefulness once the product is purchased and paid for.

Harper's Law

The missing is never found until you buy something in return.

Schopenhauer's laws of entropy

1. If a spoonful of wine is poured into a barrel filled to the brim with impurities, impurities are obtained.

2. If you pour a spoonful of impurities into a barrel filled to the top with wine, impurities are obtained.

The law of nature's willfulness

It is impossible to determine in advance which side of the sandwich should be oiled.

Pauli's law

You won't fall off the floor.

Murphy's asymmetry principle

Suddenly and sideways everything goes at once, but back to normal, comes gradually.

Consequence

It doesn't take time to break something, but any repairs take forever.

A variation of Ettore's observation formulated by O'Brien

As soon as you move to another queue, the old one will start moving faster.

Kenton's Corollary

Returning to the previous line inflates both lines and makes everyone angry.

Langer's law

If the line is moving fast, then you are standing where you need to.

Weill's Advanced Queuing Laws

1. If you rush to a short line, it suddenly becomes long.

2. If you sit in a long line for a long time, then all the people who come up after you get into a new, shorter line.

3. If you leave a short line for a second, it immediately becomes long.

4. If you are standing in a short line, the ones in front let their friends and relatives in, turning it into a long one.

5. A short line outside any building becomes long inside it.

6. If you stand in one place long enough, a line will form behind you.


Watch the video: DAT111 - Morphological Trees #2: over-general-ize-ation


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